I'm bored, so time for some jokes!

I know, it's been ages but there is nothing to do, nothing. The Jiangsu Classic isn't on TV which means this summer is going to be awful. 8 Weeks! Actually more than that! What can we do?

But I've got some brilliant jokes!!!

Michael Holt is awoken in the night in his hotel room by a phone call from the Police.

"I'm afraid your house has been broken into by burglars," said the Policeman

"Oh no!" responded Holty, "did they take the cups?"

"No, they didn't get into the kitchen"

Soz Holty.

"Doctor, Doctor! I'm turning into a Snooker Ball!"

"Get to the back of the queue!"

What do you call a gorilla playing snooker?

Hairy Potter!

What did the Cue Ball say when it was hit by surprise?

"I'm stunned!"

Why would Stephen Hendry make a good gardener?

Because he knows everything about pots and plants!

A Snooker Monster runs to the Doctors.

"Doctor, Doctor, I'm felling terrible!"

"What do you have to eat each day?"

"Well, for breakfast I have a couple of reds, for Lunch a black, brown and two pinks. A yellow with my tea. A three blues for dinner."

"I know what's wrong, you aren't getting any greens!"

Why can't DJ's play Snooker?

Because they always scratch!

Did you hear about the underwater snooker player?

He was a pool shark!

What lights up the Crucible?

A Snooker Match!

I know your laughing so hard!